Niyatistic✨

In this Diversifically beautiful world, unfortunately, Nothing in this world Is free and infinite. The seas are bounded With boundaries of land. And the land is bounded With the boundaries of water. The moon is bounded by The gravity of the earth. Infinites could have an end too Even the sky is bounded  With the limit of our vision. But fortunately, limits makes Sun set in lap of the earth And boundaries of seas n land Makes a mesmerising beach. But the wind! Just a thing. Unseen, reckless, and limitless Kind enough to give a life and Rude enough to take away one No limits, no boundaries, no form, Just free infinitely infinite and wild.

With the pain boiling inside, Holding pen in hand outside, Trying hardest to scribbled it, Scribbled that feeling down. Feeling of helplessly sailing. Sailing into ocean full of pain, In broken ketch of patience As broken as my trust on him. Trust on the god, the almighty. Just a rogue wave, and I'll sink. Suddenly I heard a loud voice Full of love and peace saying Remember the truth of life is That whenever The past hits you,  It makes sure that you break  Into million more pieces badly! But it's upon you how you react. Whether you stick to the condition Or pick yourself up and move on. Everything isn't upon me at all, It's your life and only you're Responsible for every happening. And the voice slowly disappeared. Suddenly my faith in him restored. I choose to pick myself up and Face the twisted reality again, Opposing the storm in my mind, Stopping it from demolishing my Strength and fictional happiness, ...

Places, places and places. Every belonging to a different race. Every  with a different look! Every carrying a different story. Standing with grace and, Asking us to explore it's beauty, To make memories, To forget all the problems And sink into their stories . They stand there proudly  reminding us not that everything fades away.  There are some thoughts  which are impossible  to tear apart from everyone.

This world is a big liar. They says you're far gone And will never come back. But why do I feel you Always near me Caressing me with love No matters what I go through. Why can I talk you all nights  And no-one else can? Irrespective of day or night You're always there. It's just the days that I can't watch you and smile. But every night when I come on the terrace I find u smiling straight at me. How could I explain  This feeling to someone That you're always there's That you were never gone. And you're still there. (To my dearest Nanu and dadu! You're still there💕)

Pain doesn't hit you The same everytime. Sometimes it's weak, But sometimes, It's so immense that the wounds become  Too deep to heal, And the words become So loud to forget. And sometimes, It comes with Deep loneliness. Making it even worse, Making life even harder. Taking us high To give up on life. With the want to escape, With the want to end, With the want to  Not live anymore In this cruel World. To run away somewhere. Somewhere expectations end, Where feelings don't  Kill someone deep down. Where everyone deserves Staying happy and, The life nevertheless Feels like a blessing.

Healing isn't an  overnight process. It takes time, Courage, strength, And infinite amount Of self love.🌾 Sometimes you feel  like you've healed. And the that's when  The wound re-opens. Asking more  of your strength, More struggle For the peace. More suffering. Healing isn't that easy. Give yourself  some more time. Caress and embrace yourself even more. Keep yourself first. Love yourself the most.

Swimming into the  Ocean of agony, Starving for peace, Here I am, Left with absolutely nothing Except for depression, The haunting memories, And the scars you gave me! Blaming myself  for choosing you  over everything I own. Hating myself for  loving you unconditionally. Sinking! Craving for death  to take me away. Losing faith in life. Little did I knew You were my destruction Inside the name of love Never would I fall for you!

Faces and faces everywhere... Each belonging to a different race.. Each with a different colour, Each with a different textures, Each  with a different look! Some happy, some sad... Some pleasant, some cocademon... Each face, Carrying an another face Hidden in it... Some good, some bad... Some god-like, some devil... Each hiding a different pain... Understandable just by themselves... Hoping deep down inside that, Somewhere in a parallel universe Would someone exist, Who'd read their mind... And know that they're suffering... Through the immense pain... Loosing themselves finding their way... Trying to escape from own's thoughts.. Craving to be heard... Craving to heal...

This is the thing about my reading squad and the people who always takes us wrong... "What could these reader's friendship be who always have their heads stabbed in books?" People often ask.. so here's the answer... Yes, we always have out heads stabbed in books.. Yes, we always carry our novels with us... Yes, we click pictures of our novels more that ours... But that doesn't mean our friendship is worth nothing... We talk about stuffs we read in novels.. we talk about the feelings we get while reading, we spend hours talking about books n having our food... We talk about our opinions over topics... We probably share the strongest bond over every bond.. The bond of shamelessness, innocence, maturity, feelings, friendship, love and most importantly... We share a world that breathe between pages of books... ♥️ And yes no-one can beat our bond of friendship... If you don't believe then give a try..🤙

This post is specially for those who constantly keep asking me what makes me write? Or am I a writer by myself? The here's the answer... No, I ain't a writer by myself, nor this thing came into me as an heredity... I'm a die heart reader and I rarely do write and unfortunately both my parents are non readers... But yes, I can surely let you know what makes me write.... It's the pain... Everyone has a story, I too do...  This is about the worst thing happened to me in the most beautiful way possible..It all too started in the most weirdest way possible... I've always heard People say many struggle for sleep every night... It took me some time to realise it but  I've eventually started feeling the same... May be I was disturbed and this sleeplessness disturbed me even more Suffering through sleeplessness was beginning to this all...I stayed awake when the whole world slept... After listening to everyone around me, I wanted to be heard... And those nights...

Everyone desires to travel, to the new cities and countries, diversified people, unique culture,heart melting places, but very few are blessed with it... And for those who are blessed with it, travel is all about everything pre-planned beforehand... Best place to live, best guide, best spots to visit blah blah blah... And specially when it comes on traveling alone for an Indian woman or girls, they firstly need to go through mountains of questions and unfortunately end up cancelling her plan... Being an Indian woman isn't easy, and harder it becomes when it becomes for her when it's all about traveling alone... Specifically when you have no desired destination, no knowledge of more languages... Just like wandering, unknown of everything and everyone.. Whenever I see a shooting star, I just close my eyes and wish to travel... And same I did on 13/10/2019, but this time the feeling was more intense... And, I woke up with this book beside me... Europe, it just happened... I...

Here I am... Watching myself, Splitting into two... Splitting into two... Me and myself, My heart and my brain... Splitting into two... For keeping up on you, And letting you go... Splitting into two... For giving a chance, And choosing self respect... Splitting into two... For my love for you, And my self esteem... This isn't easy... In complete contradiction, Are my heart and brain... Inner pain isn't enough... External pain ends up in scar, But fails to make me feel fragile... You are the reason... The only reason to Make me feel lifelessly alive... I want to move on but... You are the biggest conflict, Between my heart and my brain...

Feelings are complicated and so are people... Firstly, All they crave is for our attention... And when we give them what they want, They get so powerful as our attention is what feeds their souls.. Then they start taking us for granted, as if they're too much strong and act like, they've the right to be more dominant to us... Over ruling us... Leaving us bewildered of what was going on... And as we try acting dominant, they walk out of our lives... Broken... But where's the one begging for our attention in first place? Tendencies are hard to change, memories become scars and  there's no way to repay... So, Think once before you tend.. Think twice before you bend.. Think wise before you lend.. Learn to think of  yourself at least once, before you rip it apart from someone's smile... Be selfish.... Because, e verything eventually change... And Because, Everyone, eventually leave... Love yourself first... ❤

Probably everyone in their lives undergo a heartbreak at least once.. And yes, it could be the toughest job to overcome that heartbreak... Even the bravest of heart flaters when it tries to take over the fortress of love.. Doesn't matters how much the weight of the past, should one make the present bear it?? Knowingly or unknowingly one keeps up to past, ruining the present... Certain decisions of past can Change a person's life, can alter the course of history, can live a lasting impact whose reverberations can be felt across time and space... Some truths are so dark that no matter how hard one tried, they could be shared with anyone.. And that's what we keep highlighting with most powerful light source; memories... Whereas certain memories are so stuck inside that no matter how close someone is, can't be shared... But does that mean one should feel fragile all their lives or one can't let past flith somewhere away from our memories? Not everyone is blessed en...

LoveFirst love! Most customisable feeling ever a human can feel, yet the most beautiful one.. The one that your heart want to travel till eternity with... Eternity, forever, till the last breath, everlasting, until Doomsday, immortally, ever and again... Does this things do ever exist? Is what seems to be forever is actually forever?? Many times, our so called forever ends up the most unexpected way.. On the other hand, what seems to be finishing or ending up is infact starting of something even more beautiful... Not every love is true, not every love is complete.. Love often is a result of conditional agendas.. People often mistaken it to be a cause when many a times it is just an affect of someone's physical needs... Love; an emotional beyond our control, which just happens without a reason... Just casually happening most serious thing in our lives that could make us or break us... Unknown of the person we're in love with is correct enough for us or not... Many a times m...

Who doesn't dream of a good life!? Probably everyone.. And who either has a good life!? Probably no-one.. Everyone goes through the phases of life.. Everyone here goes through the process of being hurt, getting ditched, breaking, suffering, healing and moving all!! This is all a part of life.. Not everyone has good people in their life but very few are blessed with a good partner.. The one who will always try to prevent you from wilting and keep on you to safeguard you from falling but heart doesn't accepts the loss and falls and the most worst phase of your life, breaking, comes up with it's most graceful colour, breaking you down even more with every going second.. And you keep breaking down loosing yourself to numbness and keep focusing in negatives!! And then the one you didn't want you to wilt and fall keeps rooting you with positivity and build you up and keep up on you till he/she makes you bloom even more beautiful than even before!!! And if you don...

Tears Now a days are struggling even harder to roll down the eyes.. The agony now a days is trying more powerfully to break me down.. Storm of thoughts howling in my brain have started destroying everything.. It feels like life have started tearing apart from me.. I've just become like a skeleton wearing just a piece of flesh over it.. I feel to stay away!! I feel unwanted!! I feel like I'm worth nothing to people!!  I feel like being treated like an option!! I feel lonely!! I feel broken!! I feel to lay down all the day!! I feel like I should stab my head all day in the pillow! I don't want to wake up every morning! I can say I hated the voice of alarm! I slept all day coz I thought that sleep was my escape!! Simply waking up was the hardest struggle of my life those days!! I had no strength to go and talk to people! But every morning I need to wake up and face people with the brightest smile! I need to work and I need to Mess.. I spend nights crying my heart out.. Sitti...

It all started like a dream.. You and me, irrespective of each other were sailing in the same ocean of agony... Only the difference was, I was sinking!! And you were the one I bumped into! But this time I didn't sink into agony,but surely I did fall in love with you!! And fortunately  you didn't let me go! You held me! It wasn't that I directly just fell into you! I was your friendship that was drowing me into you! As the days went by, your smile,your talks, your nature, your behavior started fascinating me! Your opinions mattered to me and I didn't knew why!! Me personally being an agnostic of love type person, I always believed that love if does exist then it's just Fiction, imagination and fairy tales! But one often day, I realised that I was badly addict to you! Like you've become a drug I was addict to! There is something that makes you special! It may be your respect you give me, or the intensity of love you give me! The day I realized I'm in love wi...

In your love, I use to spend nights, Lying beneath endless sky, Thinking of us, Stargazing! I use to sink , Staring at those twinkling stars, And they kept on droving me more, Healing your given wounds, I started healing.... And suddenly, One often day, you left. Little did I knew, Your Love was poison, I'd never fall for you... But now, I wanted to live.. Wandering how could it be possible without you, So I put stars in ceiling.. And lived! Stargazing....

It was for the first time he saw her!! A tall and fair girl! Taking off books from her locker! Suddenly someone pulled her hair bow and her hair fell on her face!! Her shiny brown open hair made her more beautiful! Not only every girl in the campus but also Nature would envy her.. And the way she clinged hair back against her ear made me adore her even more..  And as she hardly managed tying her hair, she started approaching me!  OMG, A blush strongly hit me and so did she and her papers flew in air and fell on us like raindrops on earth.. I still was staring her like a moron and smiling! Later I realized I was dumbly standing on door supporting my shoulder on door frame! And here it was all started! I interrupted her and apologized and she left smiling and unanswered!  As the days went by my feeling to get in her arms grew stronger and stronger! The only thought that trailed in my mind was how long will this smiling , staring or waving hand go on!! I don't know if she ...